Of eating in . . . KFC.
It was something I said I would never do again - the previous time was in about 1982 when I lived in Brixton. I'd just got mugged (very gently - someone carefully righting my little brown portfolio suitcase that had fallen over while I'd nodded off momentarily; he'd also managed to lift my wallet out of it during said righting) on a tube train. Anyway, I went into KFC as nothing else was open and discovered my wallet had gone, so bought chips and a greasy chicken portion with the cash I had in a pocket. Maybe it was my state of numbness but the 'food' was vile - mega salty and greasy, and led to me stating to myself, never again.
So, fast forward to yesterday. We'd dashed about buying essential DIY stuff before the giant shed of Bricodepot shut, and then I had a choir concert in a wine/beer bar (odd) just down the road, and I hadn't eaten anything since a bit of cake several hours ago. No time to go home, so what was open? 'Nope, I said - not going in there,' as Mark suggested the eating experiment of going into Mr Kentucky's dive. 'Come on, it'll be . . . interesting, and maybe not as bad as the Golden Arches' - another fairly recent and regretted experiment.
'Okay', I said, 'but no chicken - you've seen the films.'
A bit daft as that's what they sell, but there was a 'veggie' option. We did the screen thing and waited at a grey plastic table in front of a frenzied wallpaper featuring the grinning founder at various life stages.
The stuff arrived. Not very fizzy Pepsi, and my veggie burger which actually tasted of nothing at all, apart from the salt I added and a pathetic lettuce leaf drenched in . . . something. Mark's was worse - a nan bread burger which actually didn't taste, really - no taste at all. I mean, chewing a very old cardboard box might have been more interesting. I suppose the word nan had conjured up a few vague nods to Indian spices. Nope. Nothing. And the fries . . . tiny, no salt and dry, like something you might have found while hoovering the car out.
And the atmosphere . . . hospital waiting room, with added people looking like they were waiting for test results not enjoying eating out. Weird.
Not happening again. Ever.