Papa's got a brand new bag.

What a great song, Mr Brown. I especially like Peter Cook and Dudley Moore's version: Mama's got a brand new bag by 'Bo Duddley'. I might try and load it up here.
This photo is of my bag - one of them. I have quite a few. Something that Mark cannot understand. Women and bags. Men and gadgets. However all my bags come from vide greniers (car boots) so I feel I am allowed to have a selection.
This one is from Alet-les-Bains V.G, thank you Caroline if you read this. My long-term favourite is a small tardis-like object from Oxfam in Ormskirk. Now about five years old it's still going strong despite the once cream suede now being dingy grey-brown. I also have a lot of old shoes; silly shoes with very high heels that I will probably never wear, but again . . . there is something about shoes, fetish objects.
Bags and shoes obviously occupy a large percentage of many a female's brain space. One only has to look in Vogue to see about thirty adverts with Kate moss draped over a large crocodile skin bag wearing very little other than . . . well, nothing really, except a lot of mascara. This is serious accessory madness however: bags anonymous. Bags to show you have more money than sense; shoes to be able to walk the tarmac from the taxi to the make-up hall in Harrods.
I looked up the ten most expensive bags in the world. The top one is . . . please sit down, if you are not already, or find a sick bag.
The Hermes Birking bag created by Japanese designer Ginza Tanaka at $1.9 million.
WHAT?
Well, it is made of platinum, and has over 2,000 diamonds on it.
Why? What possible use could it be; one would be mugged within twenty seconds of leaving the house, but I suppose you would have your matching diamond-incrusted body guard with you.
The world is a sick place indeed. By the way, the number 10 bag was a snip at £38,000, or a tad more if you wanted it made of chinchilla skin. Urrg, think I need to go and lie down for a bit and analyse why I need a bag at all, or at least why more than one.